I have to tell you all some things about 2012. It has been full of quitting.
I know this sounds negative…but wait! Don’t fret! It’s not!
I want to tell you about the things I’ve quit, and why it’s just the most awesomely awesomest. (I haven’t quit being terrible at being a human thesaurus. You’re welcome. I’m awesome.)
I QUIT MY JOB.
Now. For those of you who are like, “So what? I/my partner/my mommy/my bff from childhood quit his/her job and it ain’t no thang,” SHUT UP. For me, it is. You see…I’ve never quit a job. But how? I’ve obviously had jobs that I’m not at anymore. This is such a conundrum for your brain, I understand. Let me explain. Every job I’ve had has had a season, and the season comes to an end. Internships are semester-long. I moved from home to college to home again, and that move made the job not possible to attend. It was summer, and the position was only temporary. Etc, etc. I don’t think you’re understanding the immense amount of pressure being in your mid-twenties and quitting a job carries!
I went home for the holidays (really, that will be addressed later, because I’m sure you’re wondering how that went, dear readers) and my parents said they could see that I was happy in most aspects of life except for work. When I explained that the job I had moved to Colorado for just wasn’t what it said it would be, they said “Well, quit then.” Ding. Lightbulb.
I came back to Denver and didn’t sleep my first night. I woke up realizing I would have to go back to work after the new year, and I really didn’t want that. I called Exhibit A like a total psycho at like 7 am and said I didn’t think I could do it. She said “Go apply for some jobs. Get out.” Second lightbulb. This place was lighting UP! I walked down the street and applied at the cute new organic pizza joint. Next day they interviewed me and hired me on the spot. Third lightbulb – ba-zing! I looked around the walls of my mind and saw the dust was clearing…things were lookin’ up.
Except for that whole quitting-a-job-for-the-first-time-pukey feeling.
It was a Saturday before the new year, and I knew I wanted to give notice, but not two weeks notice because that would land me back in the schools for a week before leaving and I didn’t think I could bear seeing the students I taught (I lead tutors in classrooms, just so ya know.) I decided to give one week notice, because the state of Colorado doesn’t require any notice, so that was nice of me, right? I didn’t want to call my supervisor on a Saturday…so I wimped out…and emailed.
Who does that? Big babies such as myself. Look out world: this headstrong, capable, intelligent woman is ready to put her resume out there and get a job! But be wary – she will quit like a cowering weirdo.
I went about the new year with friends in town. Then I remembered…January 1st is a holiday, too. That email wouldn’t be read or received until the 2nd, and I gave notice for the 6th.
Poor Exhibit A, just trying to enjoy vacation back home. Too bad. The girl got some maniacal calls from me. She talked me down and said it wasn’t my fault that they wouldn’t respond, etc. The night of the 1st, I received an email. And it. Wasn’t. Nice. I spoke with my supervisor on the phone at 8 am the next morning and she was pissed. Said I should have told her sooner, etc. I said I wasn’t sure on if I wanted to leave or not because it’s a grant-paid position and I love the program itself, but that the job pushed me to my limit. I went in the next day for my exit interview and it was rough. I was told she was “legitimately annoyed” with my quitting. Well, lady, I was legitimately annoyed with how you run an organization (but I digress…)
I went through as professionally as possible, thanked her for the experience, and burst out the door feeling free as a bird! Wahoo!
Now, I know what y’all are thinking. “Gosh, this girl is such a talented writer, I bet she’s just getting BANK from her blog and that the pizza place is just whatever.” Well. You’re wrong. I in fact do not get paid for my words. And the pizza place wasn’t cutting it. Luckily, lighting struck twice in one week and I received a job offer from a nonprofit that you could loosely say I’m OBSESSED with. I now work 30 hours a week doing everything I love and smile at happy customers another ten or so hours a week while I hand them freshly made all natural pizza. And guess what? I couldn’t be happier.
So, there’s that. Job quitting = success. Next up on my list?
I QUIT FACEBOOK.
Now. This is a both a true statement and a false statement. Hence the strikethrough (ugh, so smart.) I deleted my Facebook account that I had had since 2006 two weeks ago. I downloaded an application that saved all of my photos, and boom! Facebook-free. Now, I struggled with this, don’t get me wrong. My normal routine of wake up/check weather/check news/check email/check Facebook was blindsided. It left me with like, fifteen extra minutes. Excuse me…what am I supposed to do with that? Shower? Get outside? Become a contributing member to society? I don’t think so.
Instead, I got up, let the dog out, and made tea water, then laid back down and thought about life. Obviously more productive.
Well, I started to get more phone calls and texts from friends asking where I had gone from the Facebook world, and it was nice to get to catch up with said humans. But…I don’t have a lot of minutes on my cell. Sorry, I’m broke and pay the least I can. So…I started getting mad texts as well. Like, super crazy long ones that I would have probably just dug to get on my wall. And what were my friends doing? When Exhibit A and her friends would talk about links they posted to good articles, I got a little sad.
Then, a light shone so brightly for me that I knew I could get Facebook back – on my terms. I got the new job at the nonprofit I’m at and realized that they do a ton of their marketing via Facebook and other social networking sites. I decided then and there I’d remake my Facebook and only add people that I actually speak to via phone, email, or in person. So…I quit Facebook (the gossip-mongering version) and created a new Facebook (the professional, I’m-a-big-girl-now! version.)
This one’s more for Exhibit A and close friends than most, but y’all can hear about it because it’s a new year and therefore new beginnings…
I QUIT BEATING MYSELF UP.
I’ve been told one too many times that I’m a little hard on myself. I think being self-critical is critical (hehe) but there’s a positive way to do it and a not so positive way to do it. For some reason, when winter hits, I get really down on myself. I think seasonal depression is a real thing or something…who knows. A normal thought process for me on myself goes a little something like this:
- Hey, you’ve gotten pretty fat since you stopped running.
- Maybe stop being so pale cause you look like a weird, washed-out ghost.
- You can’t afford grad school…whaaaaaaaaaat are you thinking?
- Your girlfriend is on a whole other level of greatness than you…she’ll realize that and end it.
I mean…these are thoughts that aren’t particularly going to go away. But, I’ve decided there’s definitely a positive spin I can put on these things that make them less about kicking my own ass and more about kicking my own ass into gear.
- Your new running shoes are going to feel fan-ta-stic once you break them in! The sun’s shining, go enjoy it!
- Spending time outdoors will probably make you glow and feel happier, silly.
- Scholarships are there, and you’re worth it. Apply and get them!
- She wouldn’t be with ya if you weren’t great. So hush.
I’m turning over a new leaf, y’all. I can do things pretty well. I know how to write, I’m a mean baker in the kitchen, and gosh darn it, people like me!
That’s about it on my end. Quitting is okay – give it a try this week 🙂